Empty Shell of Me

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."

Lao Tzu

Seems I have had some trouble lately letting go of what I am. I do believe this person no longer fits me. Earlier this evening, I was thinking of when I was younger, when my family would spend weekends at my grandparent's house. We would travel down the dirt road to reach the white house tucked into the foothills of the Oklahoma Ozarks, off the muddy shores of Lake Tenkiller. Some of my favorite childhood memories are set amongst the few wooded acres that surrounded the house my father spent his early teenage years in. Hours and hours were spent outside with my cousins and sister; walking through the woods, riding tiny 4-wheelers, making ridiculous (now utterly embarrassing) home videos, mixing strange concoctions out of things found in the pantry, forming mud pies using stolen utensils from my grandmother's kitchen, eating turnips and wild onions from my papaw's garden... 

On certain occasions, when the summer sun was just beginning to warm the waters and the wind, I would collect the empty shells of cicadas that I would find gingerly hooked onto the bark of the tall oaks scattered throughout the property. They were slightly grotesque, but delicate, split perfectly down the middle and light as a feather. 

I should only hope that I can sometime soon leave behind such a clean, perfect shell of my former self, emerging a bit softer, a bit greener, more complete ... a creature that sings until death and that no longer needs a chitinous coating to protect me from the elements.

In Japan, the cicada carries philosophical connotations of re-birth. I can't help but think of a scene in one of my favorite movies, Lost in Translation. If I was alone in Kyoto, surely they wouldn't mind if I left my tiny little shell behind? I'm intrigued by how the original city was arranged in accordance with traditional Chinese feng-shui. I do suppose that some auspicious day I will walk through the streets, absorbing all the positive qi, enjoying what I might be.

(It won't let me embed the video, but it's a lovely scene if you have two minutes to watch. And it's an amazing movie if you've never seen it, en mi opinión.)

Oh, Kyoto.

      photo cred: here, here, here and here

So long summer.

The wind is starting to pick up outside my window .. I think we might be in for a cold front. Perhaps it might actually decide to be fall here in Texas. (Mid-October, seems about right.) I was looking through some photos earlier and thought I would highlight some happy summer moments as a proper farewell to our longest season. I love the summer, and fall wouldn't seem as wonderful without it.

(Absolutely must play music while looking at pictures!!)

The Summer - Yo La Tengo

Rooftop view of Barrio Gótico in Barcelona.  

I was obsessed with these bottles displayed at a little fancy coffee shop I never actually had coffee at. Luckily, you don't need a fancy coffee shop in Barcelona to have amazing café con leche.

Welcome to Amsterdam. Where it really wasn't very summery at all.

The park was nice, I caught a little bit of the sunshine.

Little afternoon duck-nap.

Beautiful vintage-y boats lined the canals.

In front of Calatrava's Oriente Station in Lisbon. Definitely summery here, had to shed my Amsterdam layers the second we got off the plane and started our walk to the train station. Never thought that peeling off black tights could feel so amazing.

Welcome to Lagos.

Met some Portuguese friends while in Italy. I had them teach me some phrases. The only one I really remembered was "Super Bock." Very useful phrase.

I heart seashells.

Treasure!! On my one my favorite things I picked up on my travels. My stinky beach blanket (smells like a tannery) that I bought in Ibiza.  

Don't be shellous. (I know, I know.)

Finally made it after a very rocky trip. (Well, only rocky when we took a wrong turn.) A little tip: Don't put bottles of beer in the helmet storage thing.

What a tough life.

Back in Barca. Bubbles!

Nice little picnic lunch from the Boqueria.

Summer night in Barrio Gótico.

Little late night climbing on the Arc de Triomf.

One of my first nights back in Austin! Aj took me to the trailer park, he's so sweet.

I really didn't cook at all the whole time I was in Barca. Luckily, I had an amazing house mom who was a wonderful cook. I was overjoyed when my friend Eddy let me crash at his place right when I got back. He had a garden full of goodies and a cast iron skillet with my name on it.

So fresh and so clean, clean.

I definitely felt the need to document this. Pretty sure I didn't eat a single beet for almost 5months.

Chard!

Heaven.

Basil lemon-limeade.

Aj got this bike tuned up so I could ride to the springs with him. Unfortunately this pretty lil thing isn't mine, hopefully I can talk my friend Eddy out of it one day.

Roscoe loves this, can't you tell?

Ok, so this part isn't so bad.

Freedom!

So many more summer memories to share ..

Just wanted to put a few out there for all to enjoy. 

Farewell summer! I will not miss sweating. 

♥

photo cred: all pictures by me. 

Beginnings.

"I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself, and I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

(Oscar Wilde - The Remarkable Rocket)